I've not been feeling all too well lately, emotionally and spiritually that is. Sometimes when you think you are one step ahead, you fall 10 steps back. I just have no ambition to blog nor do anything. You can say it might very well be depression. Depressed? Gosh about life, love, money, family, me. I think about all the people that's passed away and that's still living. I think about how I'm going to do an when I'm going to die. I think about who's here to love me and remember me and who will take care of my kids. I think about how old I'm going to grow and how much more depressing stages of life will I go through or how much more can I take. Sometimes it's not always easy to get out of bed and to start your day when all you want to do is just sleep and sleep forever and never have to wake up.
I have my husband and kids but sometimes you just feel lonely. When you are in a relationship too long, nothing is about love anymore it's about "have to" for the kids sakes. It's when you're husband comes home from work and the first thing he does is goes right onto the computer and at night the last thing he does is right on the computer. No romance, no love, no nothing. I know my husband loves me alot but I want romance I want him to show it so that I can feel it. I guess when you're into the marriage too long, the marriage gets too predictable and too boring. You just sometimes fall "out of love" and it gets lonely.
I'm going to try to strengthen up and just do it for my kids. Maybe when they're a lot older, I might just venture out by myself and see what's there left in life for me. But hey, look on the brighter side...I still love photography. I haven't had much ambition to go take pictures anymore. It's this freaking cold as weather that's not helping my mood too. No pictures or quotes this time. I'll try to blog more, maybe this will ease my mind more too. Until then, take care!
“ Which of my photographs is my favorite? The one I’m going to take tomorrow. --Imogen Cunningham
nyab, whenever you're depressed just think happy thoughts. Yes, it really is that simple! There is no point to life if you don't try to enjoy it so keep staying positive...maybe you can take your hubby out on date nights, don't wait for him to ask...that might be a lifelong wait. =/ I too have so much to accomplish yet and I wonder if I will have anyone there for me when I get old but then I think, no use thinking about it...just take care of myself now and be happy now so I have less worries and regrets when I'm too old to do anything about things. =p Miss and love you nyab, can't wait to take lots of pics with you when we come to visit...when it gets warmer!!
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